Tofu The Vegan Zombie by William Vaughan

(Original blog post - Sunday, 28 October 2012
(Below text & photo originally Posted on Flickr - 11th February 2010)

Tofu The Vegan Zombie... Coming to a rotten apple near you!!

Tofu is a friendly zombie, created from a botched experiment in Professor Vost's laboratory.

Lab Monkey # 5, one of Vost's lab animals, stuffed a block of tofu into the zombie boy's open skull after accidentally losing the brain.

As a result, Tofu eats only vegetables and grains. However, if Tofu ever loses his "tofu-brain", he turns into a dangerous zombie creature, craving human flesh!

Tofu comes in a cool broken crate covered in "fresh zombie" & "no brains added" stickers with all the rotten fruit and veg' he can eat!!

I got him on (US) evil - eBay ... I just discovered him while I was searching for something else and then that was it for me lol I got so sidetracked by his cuteness I still can't remember what I was originally looking for hahahaha ....

Watch Tofu The Vegan Zombie on Youtube!
Tofu the Vegan Zombie in Zombie Dearest.

or click the video below if you prefer!

                                    

I'm guessing you probably have a bit of a thing for zombies seeing as you're currently on 

this page, but what about the moronic brain munching variety?

And exactly what would you do if you were ever in a situation where you were very likely 

about to be assaulted by a member of the stinky-undead?

Imagine the scenario, there's a zombie in front of you, he/she wants to munch your brain

 and all you can do is think "What the (insert swearword here) should I do to kill this 

(insert another swearword)? Well fear not, because Herbie can help!

Sometime around 2008, I wrote a little blog post on my Bebo page that could just save
 your life:

My 10 Step Guide to ensuring you win the fight and get to keep your brain, a few months 

or maybe a year later, being stuck for ideas and having just opened an account, I decided 

to write it up as a lens on Squidoo entitled "How to Survive a Zombie Attack".

As Squidoo is no longer a thing, and I'm having a devil of a time publishing my lenses on 

Hubpages, I've written it out for you below...In the words of Edgar Frog: "Read it, it may
 just save your life"!
Ever Found Yourself Plagued by Zombies, intent On Munching Your Brain??

Well lucky (or unlucky for you if you have) here's my 10 step guide to defeating the foul-smelling beasties once and for all!

I find that when faced with a life or death situation it's always preferable to 1) be prepared and 2) not have to remember very many "rules" which may help you survive it.

It's a short list, but hopefully it will be of help if and when the time comes in which you find yourself in a situation in which you need to use it

So with that in mind, I have created this fool proof way of insuring my own (and anyone else who reads this) survival and here it is:

It's Common Sense Really,  But In The Heat Of The Moment You May Just Forget...

Read this guide so that when they attack you will be ready for them!

MAKE SURE YOU READ IT CAREFULLY IT MIGHT JUST SAVE YOUR LIFE...

STEP 1) Rip off one of its arms.

STEP 2) Taunt it with it (from a safe distance) until it stretches out its other arm to retrieve its missing limb.

STEP 3) Beat the outstretched arm with the one your holding until it drops off.

STEP 4) Check over your shoulder for more zombies.

STEP 5) Coast clear? ... Choose a leg and beat at the kneecap until it snaps.

STEP 6) Start on other leg.

STEP 7) Once the zombie is on the ground laugh in its face for a while and tease it about what tasty brains you have...

When bored proceed to next step.

STEP 8) Jump up and down on its head whilst shouting "Die Fu*ker" until its rotten head explodes and brains ooze out.

STEP 9) Optional extra... Take a long knife and fillet it.

(N.B. Only proceed to STEP 9 - if you don't mind the smell of rotten intestines.)

STEP 10) Pick up one of its arms, snap the hand off and pat yourself on the back with it.

Hugs,

1996 Hasbro Sindy Baseball Cap - Do What??

This weird item made and distributed by Hasbro in 1996 and marketed as SINDY BASEBALL CAP SOFT DOLL  - I have no idea what the point of it is at all.

I mean if a child wants to take Sindy with them where ever the go, they simply pick up their Sindy doll and carry it around with them, or like my Son did with his favourite toys, sneak them into Mum's pocket or bag whilst she's not looking and make her carry them!

So why when they could do that would they prefer to wear a shocking pink baseball cap with a soft bodied Sindy doll stuck to the front of it?

I don't know what this is but I want one!

If anyone knows what it is or where to get one.. please let me know! 

Thanks..

Oh and also, does anyone know why it has "After Them" written on the picture and how does this relate to the cuteness I see before me?

OMFG.... Ebay, YOU WHAT????

(Originally uploaded by Demonic Angel 1975 (Me!!) on flickr.com)

Here's a strange little story....

I was watching some vintage toys and as I'd missed the auctions I clicked on see more items like this in My Ebay and erm....

Well this came up under the heading:

 50 items found similar to 'Vintage Playskool 1991 My Pretty Mermaid Doll ... !!!

The seller in China has listed it as Night Soil Dejecta Young Children Playskool Soft Toy??

I think I'm missing something here...Night Soil Dejecta that DOES mean s**t right?

After all it looks like poo...        And even weirder it doesn't look like animal poo...

                                            Omg I think it's Human!!

But if it is poo and Human poo at that... why oh why is it in with the baby and toddlers toys?

Is it customary in China to let your children play with Human-Poo shaped toys?

Oh dear god... Please tell me it's not a teething toy ...*pukes*

Anyone feel like explaining this to me?

 I'm totally creeped out now!